Comments on: Being Needy

By: loveskeptic

loveskeptic — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 19:43:34 +0000

I find needy guys really repulsive, escpecially those who are constantly asking for phsyical attention. Sex is another story, but guys that want to cuddle, kiss, hug or hold hands feels like high school all over again. It’s definately a sign a co-dependence. But, if a guy has a legit reason for being needy, like he’s seriously ill, then that behavior is appropriate, At least until they’re feeling better!

By: GoGo

GoGo — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 01:41:51 +0000

I’m so sorry that you haven’t felt well lately. I do hope that you feel better soon. I’m sure that your wife feels the same way. As for your MD office, try another.

By: nothingprofound

nothingprofound — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 16:18:41 +0000

I’m the ultimate stoic when I get sick. Just want to self-medicate, watch movies and be left alone. When I’m well it’s a different story. Then I just want to take long walks, write aphorisms and be left alone.

By: admin

admin — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 03:15:10 +0000

Thanks everyone for you kind words and well wishes. Getting back to normal….I hope!

I know that part of the lack of sympathy I get is that life doesn’t stop with me being sick. The kids still need what they need. Damn them!! Food, clothes, homework help, driving to games, etc.

And yes, it certainly is a double standard. Women aren’t allowed to get sick and if they are, they still have to do all their motherly/wifely duties.

Yes, if GUYS were the ones to give birth our species would have died out centuries ago!!! We’re just not that tough!

By: Charlene

Charlene — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 02:30:39 +0000

Not sure if this is the case with your wife, but when my husband gets sick (aka “MAN FLU”) it’s not his “neediness” which annoys me. If anything, I love it when my husband needs me and openly communicates such.

What’s annoying is that I (bolded) could be so sick that I have to drive myself to the emergency room and yet life must go on, things must get done, people still require me to do my normal tasks. Yet, when my husband gets so much as a sniffle, the world comes to a screeching halt. A man is ill. He must rest. He needs care. Alert the media!! LOL!

By: Dorothy Stahlnecker

Dorothy Stahlnecker — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 23:51:15 +0000

I’m sorry you feel so bad and often the sympathy comes from mom or gram, thus, gramma is saying aweeeee hope you feel better soon and this was a very good post.

Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com

By: Missi

Missi — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 22:49:11 +0000

Hands you a warm blanket, tissues, panadol, water and the remote controls to the tellie and sound system. Ive found its the best place to put a man when hes unwell and even the moaning becomes considerably less. If theres one thing Ive learnt about you guys and illness …. the two dont mix. You will fight a raging bulll with your bare hands, have it rip gashes in your arms and you will brag about the man scars that will remain but a sniffle? OMG you may as well be undertaking a quadruple bypass that could kill you.

To me … exxagerated neediness is uglier than sin, a mans neediness when hes ill .. well thats just too darn cute and funny, especially the tougher not so metrosexual types. I dont know how one could be annoyed with it really… unless of course its ALL the time.

Hope you get better soon.
xox-Missi-xox

By: ChrisJ

ChrisJ — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 17:01:13 +0000

I hope you’re better now.

It’s not so bad to be needy when you are in need (sick). Neediness all the time for no apparent reason is what’s hard to deal with in anybody.

Your doctor’s office does, indeed, suck.

By: Shabnam Sultan

Shabnam Sultan — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 15:22:26 +0000

Hoping that you are fine now . Happy new year to you

By: BK

BK — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 04:29:44 +0000

I guess we will all have our downtimes. It shouldn’t be too much of a problem to others as long as we don’t go to the extreme. I’m sure you are far from the extreme. Hope you get well soon.

By: ethelmaepotter

ethelmaepotter — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 01:47:36 +0000

Ah, you poor baby. I’m being serious here; I know my remarks are usually tempered with sarcasm, but you actually NEED some pity right now. Just a little, because too much can go to a man’s head and the NEEDINESS can drag on and on and on…
What I am suggesting is that perhaps the wife offers minimal sympathy because she has seen milking-the-illness behavior before. Not necessarily in you; perhaps her father or brothers, or maybe she’s even read horror stories about the men who abuse spousal sympathy.
Askcherlock makes an excellent point: clingy versus needy versus smothering. I married (I know, my fault) a clinger, who has since morphed into a smotherer, and let me tell you: needy is a picnic comparatively.
And you, dear GUY, are right on the money about kids versus US when illness strikes. I remember, as a child, running around like normal with my nose dripping buckets; now, a slight cold knocks me flat on my back. Are we wimps? No, we’re just getting OLD. Sorry.

By: askcherlock

askcherlock — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 00:00:35 +0000

I am so sorry you haven’t been feeling well. And the doctor’s office you called stinks!

I like it when my husband needs me. It’s that nurturing thing, I guess, but then we don’t have kids running around. On the other hand, he NEEDS to know that I need him. If he thought I could do everything without his opinion, he would be crushed.

It is perhaps a matter of degrees. Clingy versus needy. But I’ll tell you something: I do cling to him. I just don’t smother him. Those are my thoughts and I’m stickin’ to ‘em. Now, get better and have some chicken soup.