The Guy’s Perspective

Read article in: The Cleveland Plain Dealer or The MetroWest Daily

Pride in the uniform

By Saelen Ghose

In first grade I knew I was going to be a baseball player. I knew it in my bones and I knew it in my mind. And if you stood close enough to me, you could smell the scent of leather, dirt, and grass oozing from my pores.

The only conclusion I can come to as to why I believed I was headed for the “bigs” was the uniform. Something about that special outfit made me think I actually belonged in baseball’s elite fraternity. I can certainly see it in my own children as the don their uniforms with such pride it makes me smile inwardly. It transforms them and makes them feel special.

Spring is upon us, and baseball and other sports activities have started for many of our kids. And in some circles, youth sports get a bad rap. It is true that sometimes the balance between just being a kid, and becoming the next professional athlete, can get thrown out of whack. But playing sports can also teach important life lessons, and contribute to physical well-being.

As part of a team our kids learn how to contribute AND be accountable. They learn how to lose gracefully and win even more gracefully. They learn actual athletic skills. They get exercise. They deal with the gamut of emotions that sports bring. And they hopefully have fun.

As a kid I didn’t want to limit these feelings to just the ball field, so when my parents gave me my very own uniform, the summer before first grade, I decided come fall, I was going to wear that uniform every single day to school.

In fact, and this is the complete truth, I did wear that baseball uniform to school every day! I mean, every single day!! On Fridays I would hide the uniform in my bottom drawer of my dresser for fear that if I put it in the dirty clothes bin, it would not be washed and ready for school on Monday.

For some reason I never noticed that all the grass and dirt stains were gone every Monday. My mom later told me that she used to sneak in and grab the uniform and wash it every weekend, and then carefully put it back right where I had hidden it. That’s very funny to think about now.

But what’s really amazing is that my parents actually let me wear that uniform every day. I mean, what did the other parents think?! Did my folks have to endure the stares and recriminations of other parents at the school? Or maybe they just didn’t give a hoot. Good for them I say if that’s the case.

What I take from my parent’s example is, let kids be kids. As a parent I need to learn how to separate from them. I need to be able to just sit back and soak them in. I need to understand that they are going to make mistakes and that’s part of how they learn. And I need to be involved, even if it’s just by observing, because the days may go very slowly, but the years pass ever so quickly.

So let’s enjoy our kids this spring. Let’s enjoy them as they laugh with pure joy at reaching first base, even though they got there by a “Base on Balls.” And let’s enjoy them as they score a goal, even though they play in a league with no goalies. Or let’s just enjoy the fact that they’re happy and enjoying the moment, and not worry whether they’re properly preparing to get a Division 1 scholarship. And finally let’s enjoy them as they wear their uniforms with pride, understanding they are a part of a team; something bigger than themselves.

But as I watch my kids, I’ll also be thinking about my uniform. It represented unbridled love, passion, and all the possibilities life had in store for me. I can still to this day, feel every fiber of that uniform. And as I close my eyes, smiling and remembering, a few layers of stress fall away, still smelling like leather, grass, and hope.

_____________________________

What is your opinion on youth sports?

Do you have a special childhood memory that you’re reminded of when your kids play sports?

The Parent Gig Episode 6: Pride in the uniform [ 4:39 ] Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Pet Peeves: Food porn, Baseball players

Ask the Guys: Group Dating

Father Stories: What dad’s do (Special guest)

THE MEAT: School Dilemma

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TGP Episode 9: Food Porn, Friends w Benefits, School Dilemma [ 38:49 ] Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

We’ve had many of our readers wonder about THE GUYS. Well today we’d like to answer some of your questions. So here goes:

You: Is it just one guy or are there a bunch of guys?

Us: The site was started by Sai, aka “One of the Guys” as a dating website writing descriptions for online profiles, but it’s morphed into much more. (Yes, we still do that.) But now we have five other guys contributing to various parts of our site, including the blog, podcast and creative team.

You: So then why the singular Guy’s Perspective.

Us: Guy is a singular term. Basically we are presenting the perspective of the guy, or a guy. How does a guy think? What does he do? What motivates him? What is his next move? Since we’re all guys, we feel we have a pretty good handle on this. Also, The Guy’s Perspective just looks better than The Guys’ Perspective.

You: How old are you guys?

Us: Old enough to know that we don’t know everything. But seriously, most of us are in our thirties and forties. However, we certainly can remember our teens and twenties. Those kinds of memories don’t fade; good and bad!

You: What makes you qualified to talk about relationships?

Us: We’ve gained a lot of insight from our own dating experiences, plus marriage and fatherhood. However, we don’t necessarily have more qualifications than anyone else, just that we’re able to bounce ideas off each other and really discuss all topics thoroughly.

You: What are you guys into besides talking about relationships?

Us: We’re into everything and anything. Here are some interesting tidbits about us.

These are from various guys.

-I love Terry Gilliam movies.

-I possibly make the world’s finest apple crisp.

-I run a beverage company by day.

-I’ve played the piano at Yoshi’s Jazz Club.

-I hate every one of the 45 minutes on the elliptical trainer.

-I once wanted to travel around the country playing pick up basketball.

-I wore my baseball uniform every day to first grade.

-The songs most played songs on my ipod are: “Going in the right direction” by Robert Randolph. “Local Hero” by Mark Knopfler. “Pride and Joy” by Stevie Ray Vaughn.

-Favorite movies of ours: “Shawshank Redemption” “Pulp Fiction” “Bourne Identity” “Forrest Gump” “Slumdog Millionaire.” Actually the list could go on and on.

-I own a mandolin.

-I am searching for a Jesus shaped spirituality.

-I owned a standard poodle as a kid. She famously jumped out of the second floor window and survived.

-I climbed El Capitan, and slept five nights gaming from a hammock on the wall. (He’s insane!)

-We have 12 kids between us. No grandchildren.

You: Thanks for clearing some things up for us. Can we keep asking you questions as we think of them?

Us: Sure. Ask away. We won’t promise that we’ll answer all of them, but we’ll do our best.

You: Last question. Are you really as nice as you try to portray here?

Us: Yikes. Do you mean, are we really that square? Or are you asking if we’re hiding something?

You: Both.

Us: Let’s put it this way, none of us have criminal records, or anything like that. Jeez! And as far as being square, no question would shock us. We’re not as shy as we seem, and we like talking about everything, even sex. Yeah, we said it. Yes, there’s a little bad boy in all of us.

THE GUYS

Any more questions? Ask away! (We’re not promising, but we’ll do our best.)