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Don't give him so much Power!

From: “One of The Guys”

Tiger Woods is a scoundrel. That we can all agree upon. And if you’re not sure, just ask his wife Elin. She’ll sadly confirm this point.

Tiger has put himself in this position. He had it all. Fame. Talent. Money. Family. Now he has, himself and his one endorsement deal, Nike.

But why are we giving him so much power? Seriously, why!!??

You ready for this.

I used to root for Tiger. He’s a great golfer. No, he’s the best golfer in the world. It’s fun seeing someone from the younger generation try to surpass some of the legends of the past.

Guess what? I still root for him. Why you say? (Many of you might be bristling about this, but give a guy a chance please!)

Why do I still root for him? Because I don’t give Tiger that much power. He’s a golfer to me and that’s it. Just as other athletes are just that, athletes.

You might argue, “What about the kids of the world? We don’t want them rooting for someone who is such a bad guy!” That’s a valid point, but it actually supports my position, because we’re teaching our kids all wrong.

Confused?

Tiger learned from his Old Man. He learned the game of golf, but he also learned how to be an island. He learned how to take care of his own needs and put himself first. How else do you get to be the best player in the world? You have to be completely selfish. There is no other way! Being the best requires complete sacrifice and Tiger gladly did that. He sacrificed his family and the respect of the world to be the best. His dad taught him that because his dad was a selfish scoundrel too.

But in a very important way Tiger has it right. He looked up to his father and respected him. It’s not his fault that his dad was a terrible role model. He was a good son. And that’s what we should be teaching our kids. How to be respectful, attentive, generous, helpful, kind, sensitive, emphatic and curious  human beings.

Instead what are we creating? Entitled kids who walk around thinking they can have anything. And what they can’t have they take. It’s not their fault, they’re learning it from us, not Tiger Woods.

So we need to buckle down, stop pointing fingers at the likes of Tiger, and take some responsibility ourselves. We need to teach our children the difference between right and wrong. We need to teach them how to be solid and caring people. We need to teach them that Tiger is an awesome golfer and that’s all, and not the person they should aspire to become.

And if we do all that, maybe one day we’ll hear our children say this, as they play make believe in the back yard.

Our kids as the announcer: The crowd is tense. It’s the 18th green of the Masters with the tournament on the line. If he sinks this putt he wins it all……(Pause) The stroke looks solid. The ball is rolling. Rolling. It’s. It’s. It’s good. It’s good!! He sinks it! Daddy sinks the putt to win his first major championship!!!! And the crowd goes wild!!!!!!!!!!

If I ever hear those words, it will be music to my ears.

So now that you gave me a chance, what do you think? Where do you stand?

37 Comments on Don't give him so much Power!

  1. Interesting perspective, and I must admit, I had never thought of Tiger’s situation is this manner. For me, I just find the entire drama incredibly sad. Tiger, after all, is a man who pants his pants on one leg at a time. To have his private life put on public display and to be judged for admittedly, some incredibly bad and, yes, selfish decisions…seems so unfair. But that’s the price of celebrity.

  2. I’m with you. I separate the character from the talent, and can root for the talent while perhaps disliking the character. It’s two different things.

    As for entitled children, I see PARENTS teaching it to the kids all the time. Parents teach their kids how to whine and wheedle, cut in line, cheat, lie, and even steal. We don’t need to worry about public figures as role models, we need to worry about parents.

    YOUR kids will be fine. You recognize the problem for what it is.

  3. Well, if you hadn’t written it, I would have. I’m going to put a little different slant on it, however.

    I believe in the Golf Gods. Just when you think you have it down, and you get a little smug, those guys will zap you and screw your game up for weeks. Don’t say it doesn happen, because you KNOW it does.

    Tiger Woods, smug, arrogant, entitled by his own admission, really screwed the pooch, and he got caught. He apologized for all the hurt he caused his family. He apologized, but only because he got caught. Then there was the media frenzy, the rehab, the whole magilla.

    In one of his interviews he said that he cared very deeply for Elin. Didn’t say he loved her, only that he CARED. Very telling statement, I think. He said in another interview recently that the one thing he regrets the most is that he missed his son’s first birthday. He didn’t say the one thing he regretted the most was that he hurt his wife, only that he missed his son’s birthday.

    O.K., so now he is back at his job. If he had a job in the corporate world and a scandal like his broke, the company would fire his ass. But his friends welcomed him back. He starts to feel a little better about himself, and he goes out on the course ready to win another green jacket. But wait! The Golf Gods are watching! The give a little bit, and then they take it back. He struggles, and then he plays catch up. They are not going to make it easy for him. He has to earn his way back, and they will decide when he is ready.

    Now, on to the 18th hole, and Phil Mickelson sinks a birdie put to put the icing on the cake. His wife is there, and his daughters, waiting to hug him and tell him how proud they are. He embraces his wife, and buries his face in her neck, tears rolling down his cheeks. He does it for them, for his family, and his sweet wife whom he loves.

    This is something that Tiger Woods, even if he goes on to win hundreds of tournaments, will never have. He broke the trust, he hurt his wife and family, he shamed himself with his arrogance. He put himself first, and that is just not what life is about. That is what the children need to learn.

  4. As far as I am concern, I respect the man for his achievements in golf and nothing more; we do not idolize a person to the point that we worship the person. And that is what make the different.

    And you made a great point that as far as kids are concerned, it is not Tiger Wood but us; they are always looking up to us and seeing how we are behaving. Whether we like it or not, this is what they are doing and will be doing. So we might as well stop the finger pointing game.

  5. If I had to hate every single talented person out there who is an ass, then I’d have nothing to watch or listen to. Beyonce? Queen Bitch. Keifer Sutherland, probably is the hugest dick in the world. Miles Davis? Beat his wife. (I totally don’t condone that what so ever, though. What an ass.) But seriously. We’d have nothing. Celebrity these days create monsters. Especially with reality TV where they don’t have any talent.

    Tiger lead a charmed life. He was a real loser who got caught. And the only real reason he’s apologizing is because he got caught. And the only reason fellow golfers are taking him back is because golf is a classy sport and that’s the classy thing to do.

  6. @ethelmae……….That is the price he has to pay. He deserves it. I’m happy being anonymous.

    @Larissa…………I hope so. It’s a big problem. Tiger is a loser, but he’s an incredible talent.

    @Judie…………..Yes, you’re right. The golf gods did speak. Mickelson, while not my favorite golfer, had an incredible tournament and deserved to win. And his story is in complete contrast with Tiger’s. A perfect fairy tale ending for him. Well, let me check that. A perfect ending would be to have his wife completely healthy. I’ll be pulling for him and her. But I still will probably root for Tiger on the course.

    @BK…………Yes, we all have to check our own behavior and see what we can do to help our kids figure out this game called life!

    @Cassie………Good point! Love the Miles Davis reference. So true, and see how he’s revered. Yes, Tiger is a loser. He got caught and deserves everything he’s getting. However, I’m not sure I agree that golf is a classy sport. Actually the sport is, but not the people who play it, with their fancy all exclusive clubs, etc. That bugs me.

  7. I am one of those people who just doesn’t get “celebrities.” These are regular people, often not very nice, who can ACT. Period. It is a job, nothing more, nothing less. I guess you could say “talent” – but because they are able to act like someone else, they are turned in to royalty. Same with sports. So the man can golf. Big deal. Yes, he has practiced HARD and worked HARD to get to where he is. But it is a GAME. A SPORT. He hasn’t cured cancer. He hasn’t created world peace. He can play a GAME because he practices. I respect a good actor. I respect a good golf player. But there is NO WAY I put them ahead of anyone else – they aren’t better than the lady next door in my eyes – who has her own talents too! 🙂

  8. I agree with you. And as a golfer I still like Tiger. What happens in his personal life is between him and his wife. Its nobody else’s business. I agree also that your kids need to be looking at you for guidance not at a celebrity, athlete, etc

  9. Interesting point of view, I do respect Tiger, I just feel he had worked so hard for his accomplishments and has incredible talent. it’s a shame he got catch up in a tangle that has left him by himself + lost his credibility . both the good and bad side of story wld obviously serve a purpose and a place to learn from ..

  10. @Katherine………Well said. Well said!

    @E………..Amen. But I do feel terrible for his wife. However, if she doesn’t dump him soon, I might stop feeling sorry for her.

    @Fatima………….He did work hard as hell. But he’s getting what he deserves. What does he expect? He’s famous, but not very socially savvy that’s for sure. I mean, sending texts like the ones he sent????

  11. I think Tiger is an awful husband and I think what he did to his family is despicable. However, he is still an AMAZING athlete and I still have a lot of respect for his talent as far as golfing is concerned.

  12. I couldn’t agree more about teaching children about hard work, success, and failure – the entitlement we see is actually quite disturbing and doesn’t bode well for children’s future.

    About Tiger – he’s a great golfer, but we’ll see about the rest. As you say, he has been completely selfish in order to be a great golfer, but I wonder if anyone can direct that selfishness (some arrogance, too) to only the golf.

  13. I agree witheverything said here about TW. And I really like how you relate him and the celeb culture to what parents are teaching their children.

    Unfortunately, in my experience, it’s peer groups that have the most influence on children. Parents don’t have much hope unless they can control who their children mix with.

  14. Well, I can separate Tiger’s golf game from his personal life. The question is, can he? His actions have put even more pressure on him and he didn’t look that good at the Master’s. That said, you are so right, what our kids learn begins at home and that is where it needs to be reinforced.

  15. Years ago, I was where Elin was. Maybe that clouds my judgement, or maybe I judge success by a different set of rules. It is all well and good to be successful at your chosen profession, but there is far more to life than that. What get’s us to the next level is not what we do that pays us well, but what we do that makes us a success as an individual. I don’t believe that Tiger will ever be a success as an individual. He has no power by my rules.

    Years ago, when I was a marker for the Fed Ex Classic in Memphis, Jim Furyk was teeing off at 6:30 in the morning, one of the first players to go out. He has worked hard to get where he is today, and he has stayed devoted to his family all those years. He is the kind of man I root for in a tournament. Phil is another. I met him several years ago in the Phoenix airport, when he was changing planes for a flight to Las Vegas for a friend’s wedding. He didn’t know me from Adam’s house cat, but he was warm and gracious, and made me feel as if he had known me all his life.

    I believe the mark of a successful person is how he treats his family, for whom he should have the utmost respect and honor, and how he treats others.

    Grow up, Tiger! You have a lot to learn.

    p.s. Check my response to your comment on my blog!

  16. I was never much of a golf fan. Athletes are just people, much like celebrities they get paid way too much for what they do. Not that I am knocking that. If they can get great endorsements then great, more power to them. But they aren’t gods or special or anything other than human. We have created the monster, not Tiger. He hasn’t done anything that plenty of men haven’t done, he just lives a very high profile life and got caught. If Joe average guy down the street did that he’d be a cad but no one except his family and friends would know about it.

  17. @Meleah………..And I couldn’t agree more on both points.

    @Chris J…….Time will tell with Tiger. So far he’s done a miserable job as a husband and father. And now he’s doing a miserable job with damage control. He may very well wake up one day and say, “OMG, what have I done?” (Talking Heads)

    @Jakill……….Good point. Peer groups certainly have a big influence on decision making, especially in pre-teens and teens. However, if we help build our kids self-esteem, hopefully they’ll make decision for the right reasons.

    @Askcherlock…………Yes, he looked bad. Well bad for him. Fourth place in a Major is still unbelievable, especially after 5 months off dealing with what he’s dealing with. But like I said to Chris J, he may very well wake up and wonder where he is and how he got there. (More Talking Heads)

    @Judie………………Yes, I agree with your definition of success. Why are we here anyway? It’s not about how many people come to our blogs, or how many tournaments we win, etc.. It’s about how we treated people, how we took care of our families and how we loved. Sappy but true!

    @Jen………….Well, his father and mother had a hand in creating him that’s for sure. But you’re right, “WE” feed these athletes and performers so they really start believing the hype. And then they get themselves in trouble. Yes, we share in the blame.

  18. Wow! You really nailed it with this post.

    RE: Tiger’s personal life and what people think of it:
    – Jesus: He who is born with no sin cast the first stone.

    Re: Tiger’s source of power:
    – Society and its need to manifest archetypal figures in the form of role models.

    Re: Being the best in the world:
    – Yes, selfishness.

    Re: Where I stand:
    – Who cares? LOL

  19. Truer words have never been spoken. I agree. “We need to take responsibility for ourselves.” I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… the deal with him cheating -it’s between him and his wife. Instead the media hijacked it and used their personal problems to hike up ratings for their shows and networks. Do your children need somebody to look up to? If they do, it needs to be you. Let your actions be their guidance in life. That’s it. I’m now stepping off my soapbox. 🙂

  20. You hit on a VERY key point. Tiger’s male role model taught him how to be a great golfer, not a great father / husband. Tiger didn’t have anything like a a normal life growing up and didn’t have a normal role model. He did what his father taught him – be a great golfer. Given that, it would have been near impossible for him to pick up what it means to be a good father / husband. As you say, being a truly good father / husband is to focus on being nurturing, caring, and selfless. We must teaching a child that growing up to be a good and empathic person is more important than being the best athlete, having the biggest house, or marrying the prettiest woman. He is still a great golfer, he is not a good role model. What he has gone through shows all of us how singular focus on one pursuit can leave us missing some of the most important things in life. Thanks TGP – very insightful. -Bob

  21. I’m with you GUY.

    I don’t give a fuck who he’s fucking. Those dumbasses who say,

    “What about the kids? He should be a role model.” FUCK them.

    If your kids are old enough to understand what the fuck is going on, then they’ve already begun to be molded into whatever person they will become. Tiger Woods will not change that.

    My 5 year old, has no fucking idea that Tiger’s being blown by 12 different women a night. Come the fuck on! People are so stupid.

    Just like with Bill Clinton. WHO FUCKING CARES THAT HE GOT HEAD IN THE OVAL OFFICE? Jealous or what? As long as he’s doing his fucking job who gives a rat’s ass?

    Grrrr!

  22. On one side, its really sad to see him being hated by people who respected him for his talent. Tiger woods is a great golfer and I too am happy to see him in the Hall of Fame with all the other famous players.
    His personnel life becoming public is sad. I respect him for his talent and not his character.

    Lovely post. Have a good day!:)

  23. @Ryhen……..Short and sweet and to the point!

    @Kelly……….”Let your actions be their guidance in life.” I love how you say this. True, true, true!!

    @Bob………….Yes, a singular focus can absolutely leave us missing some important aspects of life. I see that with the emphasis on sports in my town. All the parents – and I can certainly get caught up too- push their kids to be the greatest athletes, hoping for some college scholarship, when really about 2% of all kids will actually do anything beyond high school. And so many kids get burned out, even the ones that DO get scholarships. It’s crazy. Well rounded is the way to go.

  24. @Ashley………….Like Kelly said, the media picked this up and ran with it. My kids have no clue about Tiger, they just know he’s a great golfer.

    @Mr. Stupid………..That’s the price of fame I guess. Give me anonymity any day of the week.

  25. To be honest, I’m just sick of Tiger. I wish he’d go crawl into the whole and take a very long dirt nap.

  26. It’s such an odd (in)human tendency to give celebrities inordinate status only to delight in the first opportunity to yank it all away. The Woods family is engulfed in a tragedy and Tiger’s reported behaviors reveal significant emotional instability. It’s no better or worse than the traumas other families have similarly endured. What disappoints me in situations like this is the apparent enjoyment some people garner from his fall from grace. So many of the media responses smacked of pure vengeance. You are so right in wondering what this teaches our children.

  27. I have to totally agree with you- honestly I am so tired of hearing about Tiger woods and his penis- really there are other things going on in the world. I read some article that was shocked because people were cheering for him at the Masters. Of course they are- they are golf fans- who Tigers sleeps with does not effect how they feel about him as a golfer! And I don’t care that much because I am not a golfing fan- I think he’s a crappy husband- but since he’s not like my friend or something I don’t see how that is really any of my business- anyway- new here but enjoying it!

  28. @Raven…………….I understand.

    @Heather………….People who are enjoying this NEVER liked him. It’s sweet revenge for them. But for what?? I’m not sure why people take such pleasure in someone’s the Fall from grace.

    @mountainmomma18……Welcome!! Thanks for your input. Tiger IS a crappy husband. Like I’ve said before, I feel badly for his wife and kids. I don’t know how I’d be able to show my face in public after that. He must be made of ice.

  29. Re: Heather’s remarks–Yes, this happens to ordinary people all the time, and the public doesn’t get all stirred up about it, because they don’t know. I think many people, myself included, can relate to this tragedy on a personal level, and it gives them the opportunity to vent, and in some cases, to have their feelings validated in what has now become a public forum.

    It is strange to me, though, and sad, that men will continue the behavior, even though they see what has happened to public figures when the news gets out. Maybe the ordinary man who cheats on his wife and puts her at risk with unprotected sex with other women, who hurts and psychologically damages his family, thinks since he is not in the public eye, he won’t be found out. This is simply not true–they just don’t know it yet.

  30. @Judie……….It IS an opportunity to bring some issues to the forefront of people’s minds. It provides good material for discussion. As far as cheating goes, I know many people will say, Guys will be Guys, but to me, that’s total bullshit. Someone who cheats is not able to see beyond themselves. They are controlled by their own impulsive needs and desires. My question is, “Why get married?” Or “Why be in a committed relationship?” It just doesn’t make sense to me.

  31. It may not make sense to many people in the 21st century. We have become so sophistocated that many of the mores of earlier societies seem archaic. If you don’t plan to have children, it may not make sense to a lot of people to get married. We know from anthropological studies that in many species bonding for life is the norm, and that bond is only broken by the death of a mate. In those societies, and species, they bond for the purpose of procreation, and each parent has a specific job in the raising of the offspring.

    I do believe that raising healthy, well-rounded children is more easily accomplished with two parents, whether they be male/female, or same-sex. Through their devotion to each other and to their children, they each bring valuable lessons to the table. I am not saying that single-parent families cannot be successful, but having a mate to whom you are bonded, and sharing the joy and the work of raising a child makes life much easier.

    As for the saying, “boys will be boys,” I believe that this concept has it’s roots in ancient theology, where male children were revered as a gift from the gods, and the mother’s role was to nurture and praise the male heir. These men were schooled to believe that they were superior to women, and the women were taught that their duty was to serve the male. The men were encouraged to spread their seed, blah,blah,blah. Yes, they were controlled by their own impulsive needs and desires, but those needs and desires were encouraged within the family.

    I can give you a couple of good reasons to be in a committed relationship. The first being that singles do not live as long as married couples, and have more health issues. The other being that having a companion in later life is far more satisfying than living alone, and dying alone.

    You more or less answered your own question about being in a committed relationship when you said that cheaters are not able to see beyond themselves. I think that people who can commit to another person, be concerned for another’s welfare and happiness, are far more evolved than those who are controlled by their own needs and desires.

    OMG! I sound like a text book! I have to quit before I forget how to write quirky humorous stuff. Plus I have the final day of the Women’s Club Championship tomorrow and I need my sleep!

  32. @Judie…..Text book or not, I love it. A good history and sociology lesson. Although you do realize my question was more rhetorical than anything else; a statement. Men shouldn’t get married if they’re going to cheat. How’s that for making it more clear??!! Good luck tomorrow.

  33. I have always liked Tiger Woods as a golfer and still do ……… i don’t care much about people’s personal life. I think we all are human beings and to err is human .

    This is just my point of view……. you could differ.

  34. couldn’t agree more. he may be a douchebag, but he’s not raising my daughter. i am. and her moral, ethical, and emotional foundation is my job. it’s not tiger woods, michael phelps, or any other sports figure’s job. and guess what some kids/people will go bad with or without the tiger woods’s in the world. looking to or blaming celebrities is weak and a victim mentality. own your shit, people.

  35. @Shabnam…………People do make mistakes. However, Tiger needs to take some time to sort things out. His recent actions have only made things worse for himself and family.

    @Pattypunker……..Yes, own your shit! I like it.

  36. The only way I would care if someone was cheating on their spouse is if they’ve been profiting from publicly telling people that they shouldn’t do that. Also, I don’t think the price of fame should be the loss of privacy. If you’re doing what people paid you to do and you’re doing it well (and in Tiger’s case, above and beyond expectations), that’s enough. Tiger having 12 mistresses doesn’t affect his golfing ability. The people that ask, “What about my children?”…Believe me…they will be fine. Why are you letting them watch TMZ, anyway?

  37. @Lovy…….Yes, children shouldn’t be watching that crap anyway.

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