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French Toast….deal breaker?

From THE GUYS

Before we get to the topic at hand, we’d like to thank
AskCherlock
and  One Crazy Brunette Chick for sending us such great pictures of themselves wearing THE GUYS. If you haven’t visited them at their sites, you absolutely should. Great stuff!

So let’s get to today’s topic.

We’ve had some fierce debate about this. Read the excerpt below and please give us your opinion. We need help figuring this out!!!

Transcribed from a conversation with a friend, who is talking about her first date.
(GP = Guy’s Perspective)

Friend: I got set up on a blind date recently.

GP: Oh really! How was it?

Friend: It was OK.

GP: Just OK? …..what, you weren’t attracted to him?

Friend: He was  decent looking.

GP: Hmm……..are you going to go out with him again?

Friend: Yeah, you know me. I’m willing to give people a second chance, but I’m not sure if I should.

GP: Well let’s get the blow by blow…..(You know what we mean!)

Friend: OK, so tell me what you think….(Pause. Takes a breath and starts giving a quick summary of the date) So we’re having breakfast. The conversation was OK, but kind of stiff. It didn’t seem like we had much in common, but he was reasonably cool. Well, that is, until we were about to leave.

GP: What happened?

Friend: So we’re getting ready to leave and he says, “Can I get this to go?”

GP: OK? And?

Friend: It was French Toast for god’s sake! One piece of freakin’ French Toast!!!!

(She laughs out loud)

GP: (After Pause) So that’s a bit odd. But are you saying that’s a deal breaker?

Friend: Pretty much. Shouldn’t it be?

GP: Hmm. Should it be? Maybe. Probably. Not sure.

Friend: I don’t know either. Something just seems wrong about it.  Of course Alison(her daughter) thinks I’m being absolutely ridiculous. She was yelling at me over the phone and lecturing me about how I’m too picky.

GP: OK, so let’s look at this. Thinking about it from a very practical standpoint it doesn’t seem so bad. But giving it more thought, it’s just plain odd. What guy in their right mind asks to take home one piece of French Toast on a first date??!! That’s the problem. If he doesn’t understand that it COULD be interpreted as strange, then what the hell else doesn’t he get?

Friend: It “weirds” me out for some reason, but I am going to go out with him again.

GP: Good luck with that.

So what do you think dear readers? Is “French Toast To Go” a deal breaker on the first date?

ps. The second date was a total flop. Can anyone say, “Eggs to go.”

37 Comments on French Toast….deal breaker?

  1. Hello Hello! Ermm…was it really just the French toast? I admit it is a bit odd, but not necessarily a deal breaker. I think the fact she wasn’t blown away by him during the date, the French Toast accident just confirmed it. He seriously asked to take the eggs with him…

    Although it’s good to give people second chances, I do think that sometimes your instinct tells you from the beginning that he/she isn’t a right match. And anything out of the ordinary just seems even more weird. If she would have liked him from the start and found him good looking (instead of decent looking)…she might not have found it that strange, because no one is perfect right?!

    This is just my humble train of thought of today ^_^.

    Ciaoo!

    Ps.: I love the pictures :D! I also need to get my own shirt soon!

  2. Let just be positive and said that he just want to be himself and not hide a side of him. In my case, either I finish up the toast as I do not like to waste food or I will just leave it. Not that I am hiding the other side of me but rather I am giving each other a possible chance to go out again.

  3. I used to work in restaurants (all jobs) and I can tell you that when I was a waiter, I never once had anyone ask to take the last slice of french toast “to go.” The weirdness of it freaks me out. That said, I would have loved for her to ask “so, you’re taking that home? Isn’t that a little odd?” and see what he came back with. That would have told everything she needed to know. Would he have said “why waste it? It’s perfectly good food? I suppose you don’t re-use ziploc bags either?” or “my fifteen cats will love it.” or “Yeah, what was I thinking?” Big difference.

  4. Personally, I think dating is not really the best way to find the “perfect” partner. If your aim is to find any particular person who has the characteristics that you find suitable for your needs, you wouldn’t be able to get much information about their behavior, traits, likes/dislikes, attitudes, personality, etc. on dates. Besides, dates are done for the sake of appearances and not really to get to know the other person. The best way to observe someone is when they are in their natural environment. That’s where you will see their true colors. How can you do this? Try to make friends with them first. Just hang out with them and see what they do in the wild. It’s even safer that way – no commitments, no pretensions, no hang ups, and so on. I’m suppose one will ask, “Well, where the hell do I meet people who I can be friends with?” The simple answer is… facebook. Tadaa!!! Ok, just kidding. Go to places where people who share your interests congregate. If you are religious, then go to church. If you are geeky, go to lectures and seminars. If you are adventurous and outgoing, then watch the Olympic games…. I’m sure you get the point. =)

    Is “French Toast To Go” a deal breaker on the first date? – I’ll ask the oracle and see what she has to say. LOL

  5. I’m with TJ on this one… Have you read Malcolm Gladwell’s book “Blink”? It is all about how we make snap judgements without really understanding the underlying reason for the judgement. There are many examples throughout the book, but 2 stand out. The first is the story of a fireman who in seconds evacuates the building because it is too dangerous – and he was correct. When asked why he did that he had no idea. It was only after deep probing did they manage to tease out the unconscious idea’s that summed up into “GET OUT NOW”. But, these snap judgements are not always beneficial. The second is the story of sexism and blind auditions for orchestra’s. It is only since orchestra’s started doing blind auditions (ie behind a screen) has the number of women in the orchestra increased (and there is some scary stuff on how racist we actually are – despite what our rational minds say)

  6. My first thought – he was bringing it home to the dog.

    Second thought- he is cheapskate!

    Third thought- Well, more of a memory…guy I dated, lived at home with his parents. Went to college (wait, I think he was dropped out at the time) and worked as a pizza delivery guy. He was 29. He paid for dinner out with me and got the rest of his meal (cajun pasta) to go. *Much better than French Toast* The thing was – he forgot it at the restaurant. That’s when it got weird because the dude totally flipped. “That was worth two meals. That was a $10 entree!” He was beating his head and pulling his hair. I kinda just wanted to give him the $10 bucks and walk away. Gee!

    Eggs to go? He is a cheapskate!

  7. Ok, that is a bit odd, but not necessarily a deal breaker. Maybe he just really likes French Toast.

  8. @TJ…..you make a good point. We kind of think the same thing. It was kind of clear that she wasn’t into him from the start.

    @BK…..someone else brought this up. That it was good that he was being himself. Clearly she just wasn’t that into him.

    @Suburban Guy…..Yo dude, what’s up? Yes, weird and freaky. But yes, it would have been nice to dig deeper!

    @Ryhen…….”I’ll ask the Oracle” Funny! Just saw that movie again. I finally broke down and let the kids see parts of it. I think people don’t have the time to spend on dating the way they should. Your suggestions are good. It’s always best to meet people doing something you love. It makes for an immediate common bond. But sometimes it’s just difficult, thus dating services, set ups, bars, etc.
    And hey, it makes for funny stories to post too!

  9. I can’t believe the dude couldn’t finish an order of French Toast.

    If there ever came a day that I didn’t finish my restaurant meal, if there was enough left to make it worthwhile, I’d bring it home. I won’t waste food. That was always a cardinal sin in my house.

    I think if something as weak as this is a deal-breaker for someone, then they may well be doomed to spend their life alone, or alternately, with someone as shallow and judgmental as they are.

  10. Hehe, I don’t know these days you can never be too frugal. Maybe he doesn’t like to waste food. Or he was still hungry but didn’t want to pig out in front of his date and planned to scarf it down at home. OR he could be a terrible cook and couldn’t reproduce french toast at home.

    I wouldn’t have said it was a deal breaker. Like others who commented, it was probably him overall, and the french toast was just syrup on the toast if you will. 😉

  11. Well, it certainly does sound a little strange but it’s really hard to know without knowing how the rest of the date went. I don’t think that (in and of itself) would be a deal breaker for me–but if there are other strange and socially awkward aspects of the guy, well then that might be a deal breaker.

    But you know–on the other hand, I tend to like ‘odd ducks’ and I am somewhat of a unique person myself. Although I don’t think I have ever asked a date to take home a piece of french toast, I have taken a doggie bag from a restaurant (why waste next days’ lunch?).

    As usual, very entertaining read!

    Melinda

  12. A deal breaker would have to be much more bizarre than this — like him putting a piece of French toast on his head or flinging it across the room or something. If there were other issues, well, maybe it would be a problem, but by itself, no. So he likes French toast. Or doesn’t want food to go to waste. It’s true, on a first date I probably wouldn’t do that myself, but just because I wouldn’t doesn’t mean that someone who does isn’t worth my time. (whew — complicated sentence!)

    Sounds like there were other problems, though.

  13. @bluzdude…..Not wasting food seems to be a sentiment of many of our readers. Makes sense, but not so much in this case. It’s like eating a sub the next day. Yes I do it but….the bread is usually soggy as hell. I can’t imagine day old French Toast to be that tasty. Hey, but times are tough these days.

    @Melindaville…..Thanks. We’re all for Doggy Bags. I guess it’s a matter of what constitutes dog food.

    @Jennifer……Yes, it sounds more complicated than just the French Toast. Thanks.

  14. @Date Girl…..you’re funny. Love your last line!

  15. Hmmmm it sounds out of character for a date, I will instantly think he is a little bit weird and will question him on the grounds that I may not meet up with him again ..but then that will all depend on his responses .. maybe as other people say he doesn’t like to waste food…If that’s the case I will like to say how sweet but still odd ….

  16. Deal breaker? More like-no big deal! I love French toast and definitely would’ve taken it home. I might even have taken it home if it were on HER plate! How’s that for a deal-breaker?

  17. Cheese factor!!! Deal breaker in my book so… I’d save my time and chalk it up. Skip date 2, there wasn’t enough good to outweigh focusing on the oddness.

  18. Thanks for commenting on my blog!

    I am so not qualified to comment on this post, considering that I have gone on maybe three actual “dates” in my whole life.

    But I guess I would be a little weirded out by the situation. Maybe not so much as to call it a deal breaker… But I would definitely tease French Toast guy about it.

    Maybe he didn’t want to pig out in front of her? But then he didn’t want to waste perfectly good French Toast? I could see that as a possibility.

  19. Hey Guys,

    So this is pretty funny actually. Clearly she wasn’t that into him or odd behavior like this wouldn’t be a deal breaker. I find that people are willing to let some things go if the stars align other places i.e. physically.

    In general I find the taking of the last piece of french toast really strange. So strange that I might have actualy asked him if he was serious. I mean can you even eat day old french toast? Does it heat well in the microwave…probably not because bread isn’t microwave friendly but maybe the oven. You see this guy has me going down odd ball behavior lane and I don’t like it.

  20. I guess it’s a little odd but certainly not a deal breaker. Holy shit, with how hard nowadays it is to find someone you can date and have a conversation with, french toast -1 piece, 2-pieces or 1 and three quarters of a piece… who cares? If somebody told me that they had to decline going on a second date over french toast, I would think they were freakin’ nuts. Btw, if it really bothers her so much, she should ask the guy why he took one piece to go. Geeesh!

  21. Maybe he gets low blood sugar and need snacks every hour. Or something…
    I wouldn’t hold it against him. However, didn’t seem like you felt sparks. I would try one more date, and instead of “deal-breaking” the 1 or 2 weird things, see overall how you feel with him.

  22. I always take things to go, but “french toast” is tough…kinda like “french fries.” Not so good reheated from a practical standpoint.

    Definitely not a deal breaker. I don’t like to waste & so I take things and if fitting, later throw them out.

    I understand, this is a FIRST date, so want to look “good” but I think not being yourself is the worst way to be. So damnit, I’m glad he took the toast!

  23. @Fatima……Yes, odd for sure. We’re not sure what to make of it.

    @Nothingprofound…..funny!

    @linedancegirl………love your honesty!

    @Life as a doctor’s wife……I guess if our friend was into him more she might have teased him. And maybe you hit the nail on the head. She just wasn’t that into him in the first place.

    @Faith…..yes, funny and strange. I personally don’t get it.

    @Kelly…….Can you imagine if someone gave that as an excuse…. “You know I just can’t date you again. After you took that French Toast, it was pretty much over for me.” Now that would be funny.

  24. @Kelly…..good advice. She took it and I guess it didn’t work out. He got the hint apparently.

    @Bonnie…..Good analogy. Every time I take fries to go they are so disappointing reheated. Yes, people have to be themselves. At least she found this out on the first date!

  25. I love the “to go” box! I love getting another meal, another memory of the meal, the date, the time spent out. Totally not weird! She’s just not that into him period. This isn’t about the fab “to go” box. LEFT OVERS ROCK!

  26. Okay, well, my family is Italian and Jewish and that means in no uncertain terms:

    “NO FOOD CAN EVER GO TO WASTE [EVER] AND IF THERE ARE ANY LEFT OVERS THEY MUST BE WRAPPED UP AND TAKEN HOME [ALWAYS]”

    I personally do NOT always subscribe to that behavior, I dont thik I would take home leftover french toast. But the rest of my family does and they would. So, I would give the blind date guy the benefit of the doubt that he was RAISED that way. Either THAT, or he’s cheap! But either way, she will need a 2nd date to figure more out about him!

  27. To be honest, all I heard was blow and stiff… Then I was COMPLETELY fucking sidetracked, are you kidding me?

    I would’ve said to strange French Toast man,

    “What? Are you stopping by the park to feed the fucking pigeons? What’s the deal buddy?”

    If she was confused about the dip-shit move, why wouldn’t she voice her concerns?

  28. This is so funny to me, because in my family the last piece of French toast would never have existed.:) No one leaves over one piece of French toast. But on a first date you would have thought the woman might have taken home the last piece. French toast can be heated successfully in either the oven or toaster oven. I know, because I used to make more than I needed for my family and froze the rest. Then we could have it for a weekday treat.:) My daughter loves French toast!

    Now to the idea of taking the last piece of French toast as a deal breaker. it didn’t seem that the person was that into this guy. If a woman likes someone she will discount certain odd moments. Was this odd to me? Yes, because it was a first date and usually both parties are eager to show off their best qualities. Was it a deal breaker? She was nit picking anyway and I didn’t hear any real words of praise. The fact that she is willing to go out with him again, might mean that she wants to check if her first feelings are right. But don’t go by me. I hated my husband when I first met him. 🙂

  29. French Toast to go… could have been worse, he could have been having a banana split… that would have been weird.

    If she wants to find a real date… EHarmony works… just ask all the people that have tried it… they’re on the EHarmony website in case you’re not sure where to find them.

    Eggs to Go?… unless it is half a 3 egg omelette… never mind, that’s weird too, unless he was giving it to me to take home so I wouldn’t have to cook for myself the next day… then it’s only slightly less weird and not a very good first/second impression.

  30. @Gogo……….Nothing better than left over Chinese food to eat for breakfast the next day. But left over French Toast for dinner? Not so sure.

    @Meleah………That’s why she went on the second date, just to be sure. Sometimes your initial reaction has a few flaws in it. But, not in this case. Date two was a flop as we said.

    @Barbara…….That’s too funny about your husband. What did he do that made you hate him at first? We’re all wicked curious!!

    @Dawn……Yes, we’ve never heard of ice cream to go. That would be a first!! We’ll mention EHarmony to her. She tried match.com and that’s been OK.

  31. Okay, here is my thought: If she’s into the guy, then no. Not a dealbreaker. Yeah, it’s a little WEIRD, but maybe the french toast was totally awesome. Who knows? Some places have really awesome french toast.

    On the other hand, if the date was already awkward, which it kind of seems like it was, the french to go would be the metaphorical straw that broke the camel’s back. In all honesty, it’s probably just the Seinfeldian excuse to not go out with the guy again, you know?

  32. @Ashley…….we didn’t respond right away because we were laughing too hard! We don’t think she felt comfortable enough with him to voice her concerns. Or maybe she just didn’t care.

    @Faux Trixie……Good point. Seems to be the general consensus. Thanks for your thoughts.

  33. 2 breakfast dates doesn’t sound very promising to start with and certainly not romantic unless you had spent the night together. He sounds like a cheapskate to me and doesn’t deserve any more of her time. I could understand a fancy dinner and taking those leftovers home, but a 4 dollar breakfast now that cracks me up, thanks for the chuckle.

  34. No, you fucking forgot me damnit!

  35. @Ashley……Hmm…is that possible?? An oversight that won’t happen again, unless we fear for our lives!!!!

  36. So many great comments already! As a mid-thirties single woman who’s blind-dated, online dated, friend set-up dated, and “hung out with mutual interest friends” dated: There’s no easy way to tell your friends that the person you went out with just wasn’t all that. It might be easier to blame a lack of “Yay” on an order of French toast than on “just not feeling it” — because if what he did made her go “huh?” then they obviously have a conflicting set of values around food – which can mean money – which can mean problems.

    When you’re out there in dating land, it’s hard not to OVER-ANALYSE everysingletinything that someone presents to you when you meet them.

    PLUS: We aren’t in on how much pressure she’s feeling from her friends about being single. Maybe they’re giving her a hard time and she’s got to justify saying no thanks to someone. (Or maybe I’m just projecting. I went through a few months where it seemed Everyone in the Whole World had someone but me and I felt like if I didn’t have a reason to reject someone I felt weird about, they’d tell me to think again. . .)

    Moral of the story: I hate dating. French toast leftovers or not.

  37. Ugh I once went out on a date with a guy who would spend 60 dollars on drinks but when he asked me what i wanted to eat and i told him he kinda freaked about how expensive it was and blah blah..that was the second date…needless to say there wasnt a 3rd. on the other hand i went on a date with a guy and felt awful because it ended up being a lot of money, but he wouldnt let me pay for anything..I’m not sure i would have cared about the last piece of french toast…i love french toast lol. It sounds obvious that he probably annoyed her the whole date and she couldnt pin down why, and when the french toasat thing came up she had something to use.

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