I’m African-American, love my ethnicity, and am fully aware of my history. I also have a sensual leaning for slightly older white males.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the brothers, and latin men can roll the R’s like sin (ooo boy). However, the majority of my lovers and close male friend happen to be white.
For me and my family this has never been an issue. But recently a comment was made in a social (and very multi-racial group) that between races was something only the younger generation could fully embrace.
This really struck a nerve with me. I’ve always believed that true love isn’t color blind, but all accepting. I never thought of it in terms of generations or age. Yet I can’t shake the feeling that the statement, may not have been racist, but was very ill-informed.
What do you think?
Great question. We’d love to know the context the statement was made in. However, we’ll still give our opinion on the general topic.
Differences make the world more interesting. But in relationships they are just one more thing to address. Ethnicity, religion, political leanings and class are the big four. But there are more. For as you know, relationships are difficult enough to sustain over a lifetime. Throw one more possible issue into the mix and it only makes it more challenging, especially when raising children.
Honestly, age has nothing to do with embracing differences. In fact we don’t necessarily see more acceptance in the world now. Sure, our country is more integrated in some ways, but when people leave work or school and go home, it’s pretty clear that people who are similar in whatever way, stick together. It’s human nature, and it’s no different for the twenty somethings, forty somethings and sixty somethings. People feel more comfortable with people that are like them.
Sure this country is becoming more and more of a melting pot. And certainly the young people embrace this change more than older people. But generally isn’t that what young people are about? Young people take more risks generally. They push the envelope. They experiment. They explore. And just as their parents influenced them to be more open minded, they’ll influence their kids, and hopefully at some point, maybe 200 years from now, differences, while still being present, won’t be a factor.
THE GUYS are not about ignoring differences. Honestly that just makes the person who is different feel more different. We feel people should embrace differences, even point them out. When it’s obvious, it’s obvious! All this pretending that we’re not different isn’t helping.
So far we haven’t really answered your question have we?
So here goes. No, we don’t agree with your friend.
With all this celebration of differences going on, somehow the white people(European) and the black people(African-American) have still not found a way to celebrate each other and accept one another fully. It’s sad really. Sure, you do. And we certainly do, but the stereotypes and mistrust, still haven’t changed. Yes we’ve absolutely progressed in the last forty years, but it’s a very slow change, and a slower integration than we’d expect.
So when your friends says, “…this is something only the younger generation can embrace….” we say, maybe slightly more. But unfortunately not a lot more.
So no worries. You keep doing your part. We’ll keep doing ours. And hopefully we’ll see the day where this question doesn’t even come up.