I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for four years and I just found out he’s been on dating sites the whole time. We have a baby together. Apparently he’s still signing up for them.
Should I leave him? I feel so angry??
Have you read our e-report on this topic? Cheating and Dating Sites. (Just scroll down when you get to page.) You might find it helpful.
Before you make a decision to leave or stay, you need to get more information. The best place to start is by talking to your boyfriend. If he’s been lying to you this whole time he may continue to do so, but you still need to ask him some questions. 1. Why are you on these sites? (Are you not satisfied with our relationship?) 2. Have you met up with anyone from these sites? How many? 3. Do you plan on continuing to go on these sites? 4. Are you committed to our relationship? 5. How will you show me you’re committed to our relationship?
After you talk to him, then you need to decide whether or not you believe him, and whether or not you can forgive him and move on. That is for you, and you only, to decide.
Janelle, this all comes down to trust. Partners need to be able to trust one another. Both partners need to feel as if the other person has their back. In your case, you should know that when your boyfriend is not with you he’s asking himself these essential questions: Would she be okay with what I’m doing? Is my behavior respectful to her? As of now, the answer is NO to both of those questions. Whether or not he’ll change is something you’ll find out with time.
First step: Start communicating. (Maybe even seek professional help to facilitate the conversation.) Hopefully the two of you can work through this and inject some trust into your relationship. That said, remember, you deserve to be with someone who loves and respects you the way you love and respect them. Better for you, better for your child.
If you have follow-up questions or thoughts, please leave in the comments’ section below. (You must be Logged In to do so.)
All the best,
ps. We hope you’ll let your friends know about us. Thanks!