So my now “ex-boyfriend” of a little over two years dumped me through text and completely ghosted me. He hasn’t returned any of my calls or texts. It’s been two days and I still haven’t got an explanation as to why he broke up with me; it’s driving me crazy!
We were in a long distance relationship (2 hours) which he complained about all the time but could never discuss the possibility of moving in together because he wasn’t ready. Keep in mind, he is 30 and I’m 22. He would always acuse me of being unfaithful, lying, sleeping with my neighbors or coworkers and would say he couldn’t trust me because I live on my own.
Even though our relationship was stressful at times, I would still give it all my all. I still love him. He is my first real love but I’m starting to think maybe he didn’t take me seriously or just didn’t care at all to begin with. Who breaks up with the person they “love” through a text message and just hangs them out to dry like that?! Advice on how to deal with this would be helpful.
We’re sorry. Breakups are difficult enough, but to have a long-term relationship end via text is downright deplorable, and quite frankly, somewhat reprehensible. Your ex-boyfriend may be eight years your senior, but he’s got a lot of growing up to do. This is not how mature adults handle breakups. Even if there are a lot of problems breakups should happen face-to-face. If that’s not possible, then at least on the phone.
As to why he broke up with you? It’s hard to say. Clearly he was not as invested as you. It’s possible that his lack of trust didn’t allow him to be as invested. However, this sounds more like his issue and his insecurity, rather than yours.
Our advice: Well, certainly it would be nice to get some sort of explanation as to why he broke up with you, but this is the nature of break ups. Quite often, the person being broken up with is totally taken off-guard, and is left feeling, not only hurt and resentful, but confused. Don’t expect this to be different for you. He’s showing his true colors right now. Ask yourself this simple question: Is this the kind of man you want to be with? Someone who shuts down and pushes you away when adversity hits? (We’re giving him the benefit of the doubt when we say adversity.) Think about it. Life is challenging enough. You want a partner who’s got your back, and who wants the best for you, and acts accordingly. Don’t settle for less.
Any other questions/thoughts? Please leave them in the comments section below.
ps. We hope you’ll share our site with your friends. Thanks!