Read Monday’s question/answer: My old flame: I’d like to try again
And for other insights about guys, check out our network home page.
Now for our most recent question:
I’m currently a junior in a VA high school. I met this guy my freshman year- his junior year-and we kind of started liking each other, and we started talking on the phone pretty much every night. By the end of the year he ended up moving to DC/MD with his dad(non-optional). We lost contact that whole summer and then regained it by the next school year. He ended up graduating in DC/MD and I now have one year left of high school to go; we still talk every night and talk on ooVoo every once in a while. Most of my friends keep asking me why I still talk to him because they don’t like the idea of a long distance relationship. I understand what they mean but I don’t know if I should be waiting or not, also considering the fact that we have YET to see each other since he left.
I know that he is trying to buy a car because he told me “Once I get my car I’m going to see you every, if not, every other weekend because I really want you to be my girlfriend, but I couldn’t handle seeing you only once or twice a month.” I think that is sweet and all and I really do want to be with him, but I don’t want to say yes to him and then find out that we can’t really see each other as much as we want. I feel this way because I’ve known him for 2 1/2 years and he’s been gone for going on 2 years but for some reason we just can’t find a way to successfully see each other…. Am I doing the right thing by waiting around for him?
Thanks for writing to us. We really like how much thought you’ve put into your question.
It’s obvious you have a solid connection with this guy. He likes you and you like him. Don’t undervalue that. Yes, long distance relationships are not ideal, but sometimes life happens and we find ourselves in these situations. It sounds like you’re both handling the situation rather maturely.
However, even though you sound mature for a seventeen year old, you are kind of young to be committing to a long distance relationship. We’re not saying that’s a deal breaker because every person is different, but typically someone your age wouldn’t wait around.
Here’s our advice. Keep the lines of communication open with this guy, you never know where it might lead if it doesn’t work out right now. But don’t stop going out and having fun with your friends. We also think you should keep your options open with other guys who go to the same school as you do, or who live closer. We know this could be difficult since you have such a strong emotional connection with your long distance guy, but you really do need to keep exploring while this other situation sorts itself out-if indeed it does at all.
Please let us know if you other questions about this. Just post them in the comments section on this post. And let us know what you decide to do.
ps. Readers: If you have any relationship questions, or general questions about guys/men/boys, give us a call at: 347-855-GUYS, or leave us a note here on the Ask the Guys page. We’ll either post your letter, or answer it on our podcast. Check it out on itunes, or on the home page of this site. .
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We try to answer all the questions, but due to the volume of questions it’s not always possible. But keep asking. Thanks.